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Hi Arden

I recently came across your fascinating blog (which I'm finding very interesting and informative btw). i also cam across your book as I was searching the internet, attempting to find more about the PUA community and the fabled characters of Neil Strauss and Mystery. I came across an article you wrote about how you became a pick up artist yourself, and this lead me to your blog. As I began to read some of your entries I was taken a back by your open and candid ability to articulate your rational thoughts and feelings about such complex and confusing subjects both in an entertaining and accessible way. ( i also liked your pictures). Whats more amazing is how often you draw on your own often heartbreaking experiences with relationships. As well as your ability to come across so strong, sexy and confident. Your openness about sex and your own sexual needs and wants is very refreshing and desirable (you must know how extremely attractive you are to all men.. but i digress).

I hope I'm not being to presumptuous having only just started to read some of your writing but i have a simple theory, I just felt i needed .

After reading about your own personal struggles as a young women i felt that i could relate to your experiences but i also realised that underneath your wonderfully cultivated facade of the powerful sexual seductress. There is a longing to find a real profound human connection, one that is real and lasts unlike characters in a romantic comedy. And I like many others can relate to that need also, that is the real reason I m looking to better myself and learn about interacting and approaching attractive women hopefully to build a relationship, Although you have gone through so many changes and personal growth over the years (which is very impressive and inspiring for me), I feel like we’re still both looking for the same thing (or close enough) a profound intimate relationship, that will enable us to grow and express ourselves while also allowing our partner to do the same and not feel ashamed or repressed/scared to confront both theirs and our own deepest and darkest desires.

What I'm trying to say is in spite of how much skills and techniques we’ve learned about attraction and relationships or how much experience, growth or personal trauma we’ve gone through. We’re all still searching for the same elusive, intimate and long lasting connection that is central to our very being. A relationship with an equal measure of push and pull that can accept all of your past damage while trying to heal them at the same time. I m probably over simplifying an extremely complex and personal subject that I might not know much about. I just think our struggles are similar in some ways even though we might be worlds apart.

Naïve Gnostic

How do you know if you can trust the person you’re with? This is a common problem with no quick solution. It seems the best you can do is to give the growing relationship time to evolve.

--- The more something is repeatable the more we can trust it.

Someone who is legitimate will work to build that trust. They will be consistent with words and deeds. That person will make an effort to stay in contact. A trustworthy person will risk vulnerability and show empathy. We can begin to trust when we see a pattern of consistency, contact, vulnerability, and empathy. When any of those things are missing, chances are the person is not someone you should trust your mind, body, or heart with.

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